Sunday, November 10, 2013

Is There Anything a Surrogate Won't Try?!

Apparently not!

Remember when I said I had a laundry list of home remedies that's everything short of voodoo? Well, I spoke to soon!

Okay, so it wasn't ACTUALLY voodoo. It was acupuncture. But yeah, since I was the "doll," I'm going to say it's close enough.

I've been reading about acupuncture for infertility, and specifically for thin lining, for several weeks now. But I didn't try it for a few reasons.

1. It's expensive. $90 for the first visit, $70 for subsequent ones.
2. They use needles.
3. I hate needles.
4. Needles.

Once I got the news on Wednesday that this next ultrasound would be the "end of the road" if my lining isn't thick enough, I decided I needed to try it. At this point, I've got nothing to lose and everything to gain. I called a few local places who were all booked up and couldn't get me in before my ultrasound tomorrow. And I still kept thinking about the cost...ouch. Then I found a few places that offer "community acupuncture" which means you aren't in a private room, and so the session only costs $30. One of them was having their community session that night, Thursday, so I made my appointment. I was happy to try it, hopeful that one session would help, and a bit disappointed that I wouldn't be able to do more than one session before the ultrasound.

I'm not feeling so disappointed anymore! One session will have to be enough!

First, he put 9 needles in my lower abdomen. These felt okay, and didn't hurt or bother me. I actually started to forget they were there. It was a little weird to see him stick a needle in my stomach and then feel a tingle in my toes. Crazy!

Next, he put two needles in each ankle, on the inside. Those sucked. Big time. It felt like I was hitting a funny bone in my ankle over and over again, which made it impossible to relax while I laid there for an hour. I kept telling myself "If it works, it's worth it. Just get through this one time."

Which became a little harder to keep in mind when he put a needle in the BOTTOM OF EACH FOOT. Right in the arch. Yikes.

So there I am, a human "pokey-pine" (my daughter's quote--I love it!), and the acupuncturist says, "Okay sweetie, you're all set. Just relax for about an hour, find your beach, and I'll be back to check on you."

Wha???? Find my beach?!

Let me tell you about my beach. My beach is the white sand and turquoise waters of Key West, with my husband (and/or Justin Timberlake) next to me handing me pina coladas in a half-coconut with a little paper umbrella. I cannot find my beach in a dark room filled with incense, while needles stick out of my skin and the woman next to me is snoring.

So I did not find my beach. I tried to think about why I was there, again conquering my fear of needles. I was there for fluffy lining. I was there for the smiling faces in the IP profile. I was there for the little embyro who needs a snuggly place to nestle in for 40 weeks.

The hour went by fairly quickly, but since Snoring Lady was there first, the acupuncturist had to take her needles out first. Imagine my surprise when he turns the table lamp on, and Snoring Lady has needles STICKING OUT OF HER NOSE AND FOREHEAD. I tried not to stare, but it was difficult. Especially when she stood up and I got a nice shot of Snoring Lady with no pants on. Somehow we are working on my uterus and I managed to stay covered?! No judgement, Snoring Lady. If Justin Timberlake was on my beach, I would not be wearing pants either.

Finally, it was my turn. And once again, the ankle needles bothered me the most. It's a hard sensation to describe, but I didn't like it. My ankles felt sore, like I'd hit a nerve. Especially the right one. It's now been three days and I can still feel it. Like a sprain. I don't know if that's supposed to happen or not, but if it helps any with my lining, it will all be worth it.

Tomorrow morning is my ultrasound. Send all your fluffy vibes my way, and also send out some positive vibes for Snoring Lady, for whatever ailment required needles in her nose!


  1. Thinking of you, anxious to hear how it all goes.....BE FLUFFY!!!!!

  2. Killing me girl.....what was the result?!